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Jan. 4th, 2013

edvard's madonna

Otvruss: Haughty Human or Rude Robot?

Six days ago I received an e-mail alerting me that a former LJ user named "otvruss" commented on an entry dated Oct. 6th, 2003. Here's the comment:

The subsequent time I learn a blog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me
as much as this one. I imply, I do know it was my option to read,
however I truly thought youd have one thing fascinating to say. All I
hear is a bunch of whining about something that you would fix if you
werent too busy looking for attention.

How rude! Now I'm wondering if the comment was posted in 2003, or if this idiot actually left a comment on an unfamiliar teenage girl's journal entry ten years later. Whoever s/he is, they must be trolling journal/blog sites abusing members, as both their LJ and blogspot handles have been suspended and removed. Despite this person's obvious inability to differentiate between a personal diary and an informative blog, I'm still feel insulted. Obviously I'm looking for attention here. Why else would I post it publicly? This LJ's sole purpose is to absorb my bitching, to get any little thing off my chest. By the way, what the hell does "learn a blog" mean? And, otvruss, I regret to inform that you are misusing your thesaurus, as you have not "implied" so much as you've BLATENTLY stated your opinion. Maybe if you did "imply" to get your rudeness across, you'd still have a LJ/blogspot site to use. Thanks for reading, and go to hell. :) xo


Jul. 7th, 2012

edvard's madonna

Who is the father of Lori's baby?

If you know what this is in reference to... GOOD FOR YOU! :)

Can't wait for THE WALKING DEAD ! But, why, AMC? Why must us fans wait until October for season three's episodes? I mean, damn, you had plenty of time to film before the end of May. Clark says something along the lines of, "Maybe they wanted a summer setting." Maybe that is correct. But I'm a stubborn and selfish viewer who doesn't have the money to keep buying the comics, especially considering they do not feature Darryl - everyone's favorite crossbow-bearing hero.

Anyway... I found this journal's password, updated the info, and am back in the saddle. Originally I had intended to write this long update about what I've been up to, but I got distracted reading old posts of mine and my old friends'/ex-girlfriend. Then a massive infection on my arm decided to (put it politely) "start curing itself." After that mess, I had to shower, then I noticed there is a Walking Dead marathon on... and now I'm really not interested in spending any more hours devoted to livejournal (today).

Perhaps tomorrow, before Clark leaves, I'll take advantage of the laptop and update properly.

Til then, my zombie-loving friends... and to those of you who dislike zombies, check out the Walking Dead, moron! ;)

xo kerri

Sep. 10th, 2010

edvard's madonna

"May" Day

Still haven't posted that survey... In fact, I don't think I've even kept up my two posts a week commitment. No big deal. Nobody reads this anyway. It's purpose is predominantly for when I lose my mind (more so). Reading these entries will help me remember better times. Although... most of these are pretty damn depressing. But still... memories!

Mom's car is fixed and back on the road. Thank God. No longer will I need to burden others to cart my sorry ass from Nashua to Lowell five times a week... knock on wood. Then again, I'm still fearing the possible loss of my job. Though I may complain often of my work, I'm grateful to have a means of income. So many others at this time are suffering... Educated people with degrees are having trouble finding employment. Maybe that's why I'm so worried about being fired. Sigh.

Anyway, it's late. I have work at 8:30 AM. Wish me luck. I need to schedule at least three appointments in order to secure my position for another week. : / xo

P.S. Checked out this movie "May" the other night on demand. 93 minutes well spent. What an originally bizarre movie! Oh wow, upon fact checking the running time, I noticed Roger Ebert gave it 4/4 stars. Way to act, Angela Bettis. What a convincing maniac.

Aug. 28th, 2010

edvard's madonna

a look back

Years ago I never thought I'd be where I am today. My hopes and dreams are unreachable. This will be brief... I really just wanted to check in, so that when I die, people can see that I updated my livejournal on August 28, 2010. Just kidding.

There are so many entries. I realize now that it will take a long time to find, and then answer a survey I'd previously completed. Surely it will happen at some point. Just not today. My job is making me crazy. I'm NO good at it. Every day I enter the building I fear getting fired. Should I give my 2 weeks before I get fired, and leave on a good note? or is it possible to get fired (due to lack of sales) and still remain cordial with my employer. Maybe not cordial... just capable of providing a positive reference. Hmm...

I was so into Will back then. My first love. Haha. I still talk to him every few months, but he's having a hard time getting through Hell. So am I. I pride myself on not having done you-know-what in almost a year, but I'm still an addict. The cure for the addiction is a horrible addiction itself. Will I ever get better?

My first entry indicated that I was very agnostic, if not an atheist. Since the beginning of the year I've been praying nightly, and attempting a good spiritual relationship with God. However, whenever something bad happens to me I attribute it to God's wrath, which is stupid. On the other hand, I do give Him credit when good things happen. But the former is a bad habit that needs to stop. It's not His fault. It's mine. And just bad luck. He's gotta be really busy helping others who are much more worse off than myself. I just hope I haven't been forgotten, or forsaken because of my disrespectful behavior. Please forgive me. xo

Aug. 25th, 2010

edvard's madonna

obligatory second

are you bad luck, journal? right around the time i found you, my world started to gave in, entity by entity. can't use the car anymore after what happened on thursday. mom was actually arrested because the person who put the sticker on the car wasn't authorized to do so. no car, no work, no money, no happiness. they say money doesn't buy happiness... obviously a rich person coined that old saying. at least i still have TV. TV/cable/DVDs will always be the love of my life. mom is currently sick in bed and, because my typing is loud and annoying, i'll have to cut this entry short. i thought of a neat idea for the next post: take one of the old surveys i filled out in the early 2000s and note the differences. things have changed a lot. xo

Aug. 17th, 2010

edvard's madonna

times change

dear livejournal,

you poor thing; you must have assumed i abandoned you years ago. the truth is, since my days of textbooks, innocence, and sobriety, i've endured the backlash of satan's temptations. ... aka i quit school, got ugly,  and became a junkie. recently i caught my mom typing a journal-like entry into windows wordpad, supposedly considering writing a story about her unfortunate life. upon reading what she'd written, i was reminded of you, sweet listener of all problems, my livejournal account. the layout of the site has changed drastically since i last visited, and i hadn't the slightest clue of my username, let alone the password. after weeks of trial and error with different email accounts from yahoo, hotmail, etc. i found a mutual friend with an account linking me back to you. GOD BLESS. starting today, i will begin to record entries at least twice a week. probably more.

you've been missed so much. there's so much to tell, but i have work soon.

let's just start by saying i didn't so much QUIT school as much as i was financially incapable of continuing my education. my mom's debilitating cirrhosis and abundance of ulcers in 2004 left her without a job, and as a result, i started working to help support the household. obviously one high school grad couldn't earn enough to support a household, so we ended up selling the house and moving up to relatively rural nashua.

the only friends who remained from high school introduced me to an exciting new lifestyle. her name was ms. brownstone. she numbed all my pain, and induced euphoria. however, after years spent with her, i'd find myself sick (nearly to death) if she wasn't around (my veins, heh). after years of struggling: one arrest, four addicted boyfriends, two addicted girlfriends, one bout of homelessness, several scams and ripoffs, one ass-kicking, and three deaths (drug related, at least two more that weren't drug related), i came to my senses. thanks to all that, in addition to the weakness of my dealer's product, i made the decision to quit. it was hard. i couldn't have done it without suboxone, the support of my mom, and prayer. true, i won't know for certain if God exists until i die, somehow He has helped me clean up my life. i haven't used since i started praying to Him nightly. coincidence? i hope not.

well boy or girl, that wraps it up for now. i have to finish getting ready for "hi this is kerri calling on behalf of (bleep). your home has been selected for (bleep)." hopefully i can get at least two bleeps scheduled, or my ass is grass.

tee tea why elle! xo

Apr. 27th, 2007

edvard's madonna

first post in AGES

i've been hanging out a lot at the nashua library lately since i no longer have my own computer. browsing the web as i often do, i was reminded that i have a livejournal. obviously, i logged into my ancient account ...and my how things have changed! look, you can customize the size and color (among other things) without using "<" and ">."

remember when i used to be good at computer jargon?

anyway, what's up livejournal friends?! it's me, kerri. remember?

love you,

Oct. 16th, 2003

edvard&#39;s madonna

. the last subject .

So long, everyone. As of yesterday, I am going to only write in my "greatestjournal." It's prettier than this.. and all that stuff. I'll still read my livejournal friends page religiously and leave comments, but I'll never be updating this journal anymore. Wow. I've had this journal for so long. It's kind of a shame that I'm no longer going to be writing in it. :-/ Meh. Oh well.


Oct. 11th, 2003

edvard&#39;s madonna

. "uhh dashboard? STD? :makes ass of self:" .

Feeling guilty. Feeling guilty. Feeling guilty. Rationalizing emotions. Feeling better.

Took my SATs for the first time. Woo for getting something accomplished, for once. But I'll have to take them two more times. The english section was easy, but the math part was...geometric, unfortunately. You know that means I'll get like a 900. :shudders: I hate standardized tests.

This week went by fast. And, for that, I'm grateful. Friday was the best. I hung out with the girls and a few others. I felt so bad because they drove me around so much, and dropped me off super early. I got in only to find out that David wasn't coming for another two hours. GR. :mutters obsenities under breath: But my friends picked me up and brought me to the cemetery. Too bad I was still a little too woozy to know what the hell was going on.

The girls want me to go to Homecoming. I thought no one would get me to go to that hell fest, but now I'm actually thinking about it. :-/ Rach and Danielle are bringing their boyfriends. David refuses to go, though, so I'll be flying solo unless Kelly, my love, wants to escort me! hahaha. "DYKE!"

I still have to write my British Literature paper. It will be funner than hopscotch, only not. That'll be a task for Tuesday night, for sure. Until then, I'm going to hang out with David. God knows I don't have a life outside of my relationship. :) ...


Oct. 9th, 2003

edvard&#39;s madonna

(no subject)


I'm so poor. My mother needs to start paying me again. AND KayBee toys needs to start hiring me. I need money for concerts. Fast. Heh. We all I'll never be able to go to any of them because any money I should be getting is wasted on worthless shit. Gr.

Anger. I'm furious. ha. I don't exactly know why, but I know that I am. I've come to realize that if I had ANY sort of psychological illness, it would concern me being too passionate about everything. It's impossible for me to feel anything "a little." For instance, I'm never sad; I'm insanely depressed; I'm never just happy; I'm ecstatic. If I'm "just a little" nervous, I'll be shaking and perspiring. You know what I mean? Well, I guess I'm just feeling "a little" angry right now, and the "slight" emotion is causing me to desire death, not necessarily for me, but I could go either way.

On the less homocidal train of though, school was half-decent today. Although the "comic book" project was completed at procrastination's finest moment, the teacher seemed to like it... Lots of homework. I have to write a Creative Writing paper tonight, and my wicked long paper for English this weekend. And... SATs on Saturday. Hm. Maybe I'll get accidently hit by a train tomorrow. Haha. What's with me and getting hit by trains? :)

Well, I better get crackin' on my homework. And stuff. Anyone care to kill me? I'll be the one with the plaid pants tomorrow downtown at CVS. Use a gun. To my head. Avoid the struggle. ;) Haha. Oh the "sarcasm."

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